They hurt--my eyes.
Seeing you just lying there,
Drifting away to sleep,
Not a care in the world.
Watching you ignore me.
With not an idea that here,
Lies a heart that beats,
Spelling out your name.
They hurt--my ears.
Listening to your sleeping sounds,
Wondering if between a snore or two,
The deafening silence hides "Ludwig,"
Or acknowledges that I am here.
Sometimes you say things.
You sigh and whisper soft words.
And I wonder if they are for me,
Or another man you dream of.
It hurts--my heart.
That I cannot tell you how I feel,
Because I am too scared to mean it,
And give myself away again.
Feeling strongly like this,
Seems as though I am building myself,
A trap without killswitch or way out.
And I jump in with a smile.
And then I die.
Damn it!