Tuesday, December 28, 2010

An Open Letter to Dot Dot Dot

Hello •,

You should seriously not say things like that. Yes, I mean my album.

Your subtlety is not welcome anywhere other people would notice it. It's not an ethical thing to do to publicly taunt your friends with remarks that are deeply undesirable to them (or their families). My maternal family (of which many members are in the same photo album) has no idea who you are and if they ask me, I'd be compelled to tell them the truth. I'd be bound to tell them that you're a friend who's doing something to me that I don't really like. Mind you, they DO NOT LIKE the idea that someone is taunting me undesirably. We're both already very good friends and I don't intend on introducing myself to you again the next time we meet. You know what I mean. I've been through it. It's weird.

I have no problem, whatsoever, with you teasing me in private. I have high tolerance for those things and I understand you. Just remember that I'm the one you need to direct your messages to. They're not for the visual consumption or intellectual scrutiny of anyone else. I need you to know that a LINE does exist. This line I'm talking about is not very hard to cross. I am also not God-like. I am not eternally lenient and forgiving. I have emotional limitations, too.

Please do not take this negatively. My attitude towards you will not change after clicking send. This is something that we'd both giggle about later if you adhere and understand. We will always be good friends who laugh and pinch each other and talk on the phone and text and what not.

I know I'm being too idealistically positive about my infatuation towards Δ. You may say I'm dreaming the impossible dream, but I don't care. I'm not expecting anything in return. It's just that this feeling exists for me and me alone. I don't mind if it isn't reciprocated by Δ. I'll just make it linger until it burns out. It's not harming me, anyway. It's not affecting my life in any relevant way. My ability to function isn't hampered. I'm not obsessed with Δ. This whole thing does NOT involve lust in any sort of way. I'm not being a vulture; I'm not casting spells; I'm not making elaborate photo collages; and I'm not trying to get Δ's attention. In fact, I'm even doing the complete inverse. I'm avoiding Δ because I'm aware that I'm never going to achieve what I desire. I'm just allowing the emotion to fly free. It's just a feeling. It's been just an infatuation since the beginning. NOTHING MORE! I wish it'd go away, but there's no use trying to force it to die. It's hard to combat ◊ years of admiration, you know--especially if it has this kind of logical and rational backing. I'm just letting it be.

I believe you can resonate with me.

You can go on with your teasing all you like. Just direct them to me--NOT publicly and not uncouthly. Please! I don't like losing friends. I don't like losing YOU as a friend.

Sincerely and with much love,